Wednesday, April 21, 2010

I have an Anger problem. But you might have one too.

The wife and I had Ayofemi over for dinner last Friday night. Generally I don’t like being “Told” in my own house but this time it was needed. She called me out on some of my BS. I was telling her how America duped us into believing that we could have it all. How we were told that a degree was going to cure our ills. And that our employers were going to take care of us until retirement. We were sold on dreams of homeownership and a vacation to Disney World. If we just did everything right, we would live happy lives (Keep in mind I’m sweating profusely while I’m ranting.) I go on to tell everyone at the dinner table that I’m angry. I even tell them that the middle class is Angry and we are tired of being duped. And then out of nowhere Ayofemi asks me who am I mad at?

Side Note – Uh Oh!!!

I didn’t have an answer to her question. I just sat there stammering and sweating. I really wanted to run down a list of names but I couldn’t. All of the names and places that were rolling around in my head and I couldn’t even spit them out. As everyone sat staring at me, I realized that I have a problem. It’s not just my problem; it’s an America’s problem. We are all “Angry” and we don’t know who to be “Angry” with. So we shake our fists at the person that is the easiest to blame.

America has a Tea Party that complains about how the Government spends money but where were they when Bush 2.0 was in office. What does being over taxed have to do with a poster of Obama fashioned to look like Hitler? If you look at them when they are protesting, they look so confused and angry. And that’s how I looked when I was talking to my dinner guest. Sure I can blame the banks for me being laid off. I can blame the politicians for high gas and milk. I can even blame Jay Leno for ruining NBC. But all it does is make me angry. And I spend my days looking for someone to blame. Why? Because someone is at fault for my problems and they must pay!!! Or so I thought…..

The reality is that life isn’t fair and nothing is promised. Sometimes people treat you right and sometimes they screw you over. Life is about getting back up when you get knocked down. It’s not about you wallowing in self pity. Instead of me blaming people for my problems, I need to find solutions for them.


msladyDeborah said...


I use to be an Angry American. Thanks goodness that was during my early adult times. It occurred to me one night that what my mother believes is the cure for such times needed to be applied to my sense of outrage.

Instead of being angry-do whatever is within your power to do better and then tell whomever it is to step on off and try to smell better.

This may sound crazy. But I applied this when my marriage ended. And it worked. I have since used this motivation theory so many times that it has become a natural response.

We are standing at a crossroads as a nation of people. Either we are going to realize that we have the capacity to re-group and work our way out. Or we're all going to fall down on our capitalist butts and wallow in the murkiness of our out of control habits.

Val said...

Black Tea Party movement anyone? Lol I think we have a lot more to be angry about than those Tea Party buffoons.

Citizen Ojo said...

msladydeborah - Oh I see you had your moment too. You were one of the fortunate ones that learned early. Yes, the capitalist system need to learn compassion. This greed we have is killing us.

Val - I hear that they are called the Coffee party. Go figure..

Val said...


uglyblackjohn said...

The trick is to find out what you REALLY want - not just what everyone tells you to want.

A half-milli in cash at 30 is not a lot of money in Cali - it won't even buy a house in a nice neighborhood.
But the same 500k could set one up pretty nicely on a smaller Southern town where one could buy a nice house on the good side of town, a nice car and truck, furniture, a few toys and some income property.
Sure, it gets boring at times but a guy still has a little change left over to fly back to Cali for dinners with friends.
A guy still has enough left over to only work on what he wants and only when he feels like it.

Why fall for a philosophy which puts the masses in a seemingly eternal debt?

NCCU Alumni said...

When you are humbled to admit that you are angry, thats a good thing! It boils down to accountability. Americans are trendy... They are easily sold on a way of life and follow the "roadmap to success" when in reality it is a strategic approach by ????? Did we every figure out the who in all this? LOL!