Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Rihanna using nudity as therapy or is she covering up the pain?

I was looking at the latest issue of GQ Magazine and was having a hard time figuring out who was on the cover. At first I thought it was another white woman attempting to hitch a ride on the Tiger Woods train. But then I realized that it was a pale-ish looking Rihanna. I didn’t know she was that light (keeping the black under wraps maybe)? Better yet, I didn’t know she was that naked?

I have been trying to understand Rihanna since the day Chris Brown used her as a punching bag. I didn’t understand when after the beating she was seen with Brown at the beach. I didn’t understand when naked photos (that she took of herself) of her came out a few weeks later. And now she’s on the cover of GQ Half Naked? Is this publicity for her album or is this how she really is? Is she supposed to be a role model for young girls? I don’t want to give her that title if it’s not something that she advocated for. But it seems that I see a lot of young girls listening to her music. Maybe the parents of those kids don’t mind her song content. Songs that talk about “getting her hair pulled” while having sex.

It’s not my place to determine how a person should act after they suffered abuse. But I personally find Rihanna’s behavior odd. Her recent actions are negating the seriousness of what happened between her and Chris Brown. You just can’t tell whether or not she understands what truly took place. Is she even bothered by what happened? I’m against abuse against women so it bothers me to ask the questions. But something isn’t right!!

I believe Rihanna’s handlers have done her a disservice. Instead of getting her counseling, they have decided to continue with “BUSINESS” as usual. Her handlers have her selling records, performing concerts, and doing interviews. Interviews that have her looking and sounding like a child. Her handlers may think that everything is back to normal but her actions tell a different story. Rihanna is in the public eye and she still suffers in private. Just like so many other young women her age that suffer from physical abuse.


peachyfay07 said...

This post has articulated everything I've been trying to explain to my "battered woman bandwagon" friends. I've been accused of being a enabler of abuse & desensitized by the affects of abused women because I feel the same way you do and I believe you are right on point.

My question to them was: How can I "feel" for someone who isn't really giving me signs of someone who WANTS/NEEDS sympathy?!

All those who have been affected directly and indirectly domestic violence took this situation VERY seriously and it would be nice if she did the same.

I personally think that she has a mind of her own & is able to make her own decisions about HER business moves & her LIFE. It's quite obvious she chose business & ultimately she will be the only one to reap what she sowed.

*Great post*

Reggie said...

I wasn't thinking that this was associated with the abuse, but I guess you could be right. I get she's sexy as hell, I think that everyone does that looks at her. Maybe she would have done something like this next anyway, maybe she wouldn't?!?

Yeah, she's apparently sexing it up and it's unnecessary. She appears to be going the way of Mariah Carey, they're both talented and usually half naked and it's unnecessary....they're both talented as hell. I don't get it; but I have to admit, she is sexy as hell!!!

Citizen Ojo said...

peachyfay07 - as a man I was concerned with how I approached this subject because although I stand by what I said. I don't want to ever appear like insensitive but this is a bad look. Between her and Chris Brown the violence that took place is destined to be a roadbump in the pop culture history. Instead of being treated in a serious manner.

Reggie - I'm not sold on Rihanna as being a sex symbol...personal preference I guess. But is she following the Mariah Carey "get my sexy game up" route? Yep!! And Mariah was late to the game when she did it. It seems like all these thundercats are chasing Beyonce. I guess since Beyonce has the onesies market covered why not just go ahead a get naked.

The Smoking Ace said...


you hit it right on nail with this on head on what you told peachyfay07.

"peachyfay07 - as a man I was concerned with how I approached this subject because although I stand by what I said. I don't want to ever appear like insensitive but this is a bad look. Between her and Chris Brown the violence that took place is destined to be a roadbump in the pop culture history. Instead of being treated in a serious manner."

I was wondering that when I saw, plus I just really felt uncomfortable with Rihanna posing nude weeks after she was on 20/20 talking about the Chris Brown/Rihanna situation. It just did not feel right. I am wondering who her publicist is because personal matter should be put in the forefront of business and you cannot kick the dust off of domestic abuse within months especially after having it recalled in an interview weeks before.

Citizen Ojo said...

The Smoking Ace - Thank you. Yeah the handlers for Rihanna and Chris Brown don't understand the psychological aspects of what happened. But when you get paid to tell people what they want to hear why would you care about that.

Anonymous said...

I felt the same way after seeing her on the cover. I had so much respect for her really trying to speak and say abuse is wrong on and then she reflected on how she realized what an influence she had on girls and she did not want to be responsible for being the cause for them staying in an abusive relationship.

But, now she's coming out nude and using explicit lyrics in her music. As a person who has been through abuse there is a level of confusion as regards to sense of self when someone has torn down your self-esteem in this manner. You feel worthless and insignificant. and sometimes you don't fully comprehend it until later.

Maybe this is her way of compensating? Maybe she's trying to show CB what he's missing? Maybe she's just promoting the album? Who knows her motivations.

But, I have to disagree that she isn't showing signs of how serious the situation was. Nobody knows better than she does the humiliation of what she went through. She may think she can just go on with her life. All the photo shoots and things may have been planned pre what happened. And bearing in mind that she does have obligations to those who put out her music (contracts) and has to live up to them. Not that I agree with them by any means.

Either way, whether she is receiving therapy now or later she will need it. Also, she will need to really take time to regain her self-esteem after this. It can take years to get over abuse because it always leaves deep emotional scars long after the physical ones are gone and people forget what happened.

I asked myself, reflecting on my own personal experience which I suffered in private, how I would act if I had been forced to experience them in the public eye? My battered face on every magazine and website in the world? The story being told over and over? People saying it was my fault? I deserved it. And worse yet, people speaking out in defense of the person who did it to me? It saddens me that anyone would have to go through that.

Citizen Ojo said...

Toya - This is the difficulty of attempting to talk about this subject from a Males point of view. You run the risk of looking like an insensitive jerk. By no means am I attempting to belittle the situation, but there are a lot of unanswered questions that need to be answered. And not because I think the public necessarily wants to know. I think the two individuals involved never received a proper form of help and that’s why both of them “seem” to act as though it never happened.

I appreciate your view point because it is much needed in this conversation. Unfortunately you are coming from a place that could provide clarification on this subject. But fortunately you can help others that might have gone through what you went through. I thank you for stopping by and I hope to hear more from you. Especially on this subject and other subjects I might have on my blog.